"HEY! Where do you think you're going?"
Dr. D. thinks she's leaving home. Well, that's what she told me anyway.
The Dr. loves her bath. Loves it. Hates getting out, and fights me tooth and nail every night. The other night I took her out of the bath, and she began to fuss and squirm and cry. As I was drying her off, she said simply:
"I....go..."
I laughed at her in spite of myself, and said, "Oh yea? Where do you think YOU'RE going?" not really expecting an answer.
After a little while she said, "A-way..."
At that moment I pictured her with her little polka-dot kerchief hanging on a stick as she left home.
My birthday was last weekend. We left the girls with my MIL, and DH and I went out for the night. We dropped the girls off, and we were sitting down to eat dinner at 5:30pm. In the restaurant with all the old folks. Those seniors are on to something: the restaurant was empty, we didn't wait for a table, the food came quickly...it was heaven. I had a lovely, leisurely dinner (along with a few very smart cocktails). Then we went to the movies, and we were home by 10:30pm. I needed to watch the Ultimate Fighting PPV on cable: Tito Ortiz vs. Ken Shamrock (and Ken got his ass spanked again - YEAH!)
The following day we picked the girls up, and were driving home. I was zipping along in the middle lane of a 3-lane highway, going about 60mph, when I glanced into my rear view mirror and realized with horror that I was being tailgated. Rather aggressively, I might add, by some asshole in a BMW SUV. Now, I'll admit, I drive like a fart nowadays, especially when my kids are in the car, but that wasn't the case today. This guy had no reason whatsoever to tailgate me, other than to be obnoxious. I got out of his way and watched him do it to everyone else he encountered. Come on people, where the hell are you going that you need to drive that way? Seriously, all you need to do is encounter one nervous grandma behind the wheel who will look in her rearview mirror, see the whites of your eyes, and slam on the brakes in a panic. And then you're dead (or at the very least, paying out the wazoo to fix little grammie's car), what's the point? So a big FUCK YOU to all you asshole aggressive drivers.
In other news, I found a lump in my armpit this week. It hurt like hell. I was seriously freaking out, thinking the worst. The good news is that it was an inflammed sweat gland. The bad news is that I am (apparently) a big, fat, sweaty pig.
How many times has THIS happened to you, ladies? - You wake up in the middle of the night to answer nature's call. You stumble to the bathroom in the dark, your eyes barely open. And as you sit down on the toilet, realize (to your horror) that your DH had forgotten to put the seat down after HE peed, so now you're sitting on the cold porcelain of the toilet?? I swear, I almost beat the crap out my sleeping husband last night.
Here's this week's Friday Fiver:
Name the last person you...
1. Hugged: - My daughters
2. Smiled at: My daughters
3. Deceived:My mother (sorry mom)
4. Glared at: My DH
5. Lusted after: Don't laugh. Alton Brown. I just *heart* thinking men.
The Dr. loves her bath. Loves it. Hates getting out, and fights me tooth and nail every night. The other night I took her out of the bath, and she began to fuss and squirm and cry. As I was drying her off, she said simply:
"I....go..."
I laughed at her in spite of myself, and said, "Oh yea? Where do you think YOU'RE going?" not really expecting an answer.
After a little while she said, "A-way..."
At that moment I pictured her with her little polka-dot kerchief hanging on a stick as she left home.
My birthday was last weekend. We left the girls with my MIL, and DH and I went out for the night. We dropped the girls off, and we were sitting down to eat dinner at 5:30pm. In the restaurant with all the old folks. Those seniors are on to something: the restaurant was empty, we didn't wait for a table, the food came quickly...it was heaven. I had a lovely, leisurely dinner (along with a few very smart cocktails). Then we went to the movies, and we were home by 10:30pm. I needed to watch the Ultimate Fighting PPV on cable: Tito Ortiz vs. Ken Shamrock (and Ken got his ass spanked again - YEAH!)
The following day we picked the girls up, and were driving home. I was zipping along in the middle lane of a 3-lane highway, going about 60mph, when I glanced into my rear view mirror and realized with horror that I was being tailgated. Rather aggressively, I might add, by some asshole in a BMW SUV. Now, I'll admit, I drive like a fart nowadays, especially when my kids are in the car, but that wasn't the case today. This guy had no reason whatsoever to tailgate me, other than to be obnoxious. I got out of his way and watched him do it to everyone else he encountered. Come on people, where the hell are you going that you need to drive that way? Seriously, all you need to do is encounter one nervous grandma behind the wheel who will look in her rearview mirror, see the whites of your eyes, and slam on the brakes in a panic. And then you're dead (or at the very least, paying out the wazoo to fix little grammie's car), what's the point? So a big FUCK YOU to all you asshole aggressive drivers.
In other news, I found a lump in my armpit this week. It hurt like hell. I was seriously freaking out, thinking the worst. The good news is that it was an inflammed sweat gland. The bad news is that I am (apparently) a big, fat, sweaty pig.
How many times has THIS happened to you, ladies? - You wake up in the middle of the night to answer nature's call. You stumble to the bathroom in the dark, your eyes barely open. And as you sit down on the toilet, realize (to your horror) that your DH had forgotten to put the seat down after HE peed, so now you're sitting on the cold porcelain of the toilet?? I swear, I almost beat the crap out my sleeping husband last night.
Here's this week's Friday Fiver:
Name the last person you...
1. Hugged: - My daughters
2. Smiled at: My daughters
3. Deceived:My mother (sorry mom)
4. Glared at: My DH
5. Lusted after: Don't laugh. Alton Brown. I just *heart* thinking men.
posted by scrappintwinmom @ 2:25 AM
3 Comments:
At 2:37 AM,
verniciousknids said…
As long as it's just cold porcelain you're sitting on...additions are even more unpleasant!
Michele sent me today.
At 11:51 PM,
Tracie Nall said…
I have to say that women everywhere are complainin gthat their husbands won't put the seat down....but my only request is that he lifts the seat in the first place. I'd rather have the porcelain than the "splattered" seat--if you know what I mean :)
Michele says Hi!
At 12:02 AM,
MorahMommy said…
Thankfully this is one problem I don't have to worry about! My hubby leaves it just the way I like it. My kids drive me crazy because they don't flush! Yuck!!!
Happy belated birthday. It sounds like it was really nice.
Michele sent me!
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