It was one year ago today..

One year ago today I stopped into my Doctor's office for a routine check, just as I'd done every week for the past 34 weeks. One year ago today my life changed forever. My doctor found high levels of protein in my urine, and my blood pressure was 200/100. I was retaining so much fluid I was ready to float away. He peered at me over his glasses and said, "Looks like we're going to have some babies". I replied, "yeah, I know. Around June 1st, right?". He said, "No. Now. Tonight." To which I replied with the most ridiculous comment ever uttered by a pregnant woman: "I can't have babies tonight! I have a half-cooked dinner on the stove, and I haven't finished washing all the baby things I got at the baby shower! I'm supposed to have two more weeks!" The doctor shook his head, walked away and left his staff to deal with the hysterical mess I had become.

I called DH, who was still in NYC, working late. I managed to drive home without killing myself, and began to pack (no, I hadn't packed my hospital bag yet. I had two more weeks, remember?). When DH came home, I was still hysterical. I said, "This isn't right! I'm supposed to have two more weeks! I'm not ready!". He grabbed my hands and said, "yes, you are. Now get your ass in the car". I checked into the hospital at around 7pm. I remember watching Seinfeld.

They hooked me up to IV, monitors, catheter (that was fun, considering I'd begun to have contractions), and magnesium. I sweated my balls off for nearly six hours. DH was starving, and couldn't get out of the ward to buy food. At 1am, they began to prep me for surgery. They wheeled me into the OR. I had my spinal administered - I was so scared. To this day, I still feel "ghost pains" in my lower back where I had the spinal. They couldn't find DH and were going to start without him. I pitched a fit. NO WAY were they going to start without him there.

Finally, they got started. Dr. H. walked in, and said, "Let's rock n' roll".

I lay there, feeling all sorts of pulling and pressure. DH looked pale. I didn't know it at the time, but they had trouble getting the babies out due to a fibroid tumor in the way (no wonder we never saw Baby D. on the sono, she was hiding behind it). DH said that he saw my blood rolling down the OR table, and began to think that maybe something was wrong (gee, d'ya think?). The doctor didn't really walk us through what was going on, and I didn't know my babies were out until I heard them crying. D. was born at 1:54am and S. came out 2 minutes later. D. spent her first week in the NICU - that was a tough week. I'll never forget what she looked like in the isolette, with a feeding tube down her throat. To see her today, you'd never know it.

I'm sitting here in my living room with the girls. I have a big blanket on the floor with pillows all around the perimeter. They're both happily rolling around, playing with toys...every once in a while, D. will come over and try to use me to pull herself up. I found her standing in her crib this morning - my little adventurer. Little S. is quite content to sit her ass down and play quietly - she's not feeling well today - she has a slight ear infection, thanks to my germy-ass nieces who were here last week. Am I a complete germophobe? These girls are forever kissing my babies on the mouth and hands. I tell them to stop, and DH tells me not to treat them like they're germs...what he doesn't get is that they ARE germs! These kids are immunized against things that my kids are not, and they've built up an immunity to things that my kids have not yet.

This has been a long-ass year, and yet its all gone so quickly. Before I know it, they'll be borrowing the car - or so I'm told.